My Husband is a Compulsive Gambler

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Administrator
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Joined: Tue May 13, 2008 5:00 pm

Post by Administrator » Wed May 14, 2008 7:55 am

(originally posted by EricF0515)

You are not alone. The malady of compulsive gambling effects so many lives beyond the sufferers. They call it a "family illness". There are a lot of resources in Orlando. The help-line (1888-ADMIT-IT) offers a lot of help to family members. (Counsling, Gam-Anon meeting lists, peer connect program, etc.) It is also completely anonymous. I just want you to know that you need help, regardless of what he chooses to do.
There are plenty of instances where the family gets help, before the gambler. I am a compulsive gambler and have been abstinent for a little over two years now. I can only speak for myself and from my experience. When my family finally cut me off and got help for themselves, through counseling, I was able to see my situation for what it really was. Prior to that they tried everything they could to help me. They bailed me out a few times, forgave, had hope, and tried to protect me. Despite their best efforts all that was really happening was they were "loving me to death" and helping me to stay sick. Gamblers are like Tea bags; they only work in hot water. When I fell, and they weren't there to pick me up like every other time, I was forced to make the decision to seek help or continue on; blotting out the reality of my hopeless situation. Those terrible weeks, which seemed to be the worst time in my life, turned out to be the turning point that led me down this road to this amazing life that I couldn't imagine. I've since made amends with them, both emotional and financial, and we have been able to talk about all of the stuff that happened. They say how hard it was to "detach with love" because it went against all instincts. They were also at a "bottom" and had to trust in faith that that was the best thing for all of us. They also have told me that even if it didn't lead to me getting help, when they took that position and started getting help for themselves they were given a new freedom and way to look at the situation.
I know its hard. I am kind of on the other side of things, but I look at it like this: I didn't want it, plan for it, or try for it...... but I got it. Now what.

There is help for you. It certainly wont hurt calling the help line. Good luck and keep us posted on what you decide to do.

Administrator
Posts: 207
Joined: Tue May 13, 2008 5:00 pm

Financial supports

Post by Administrator » Wed May 14, 2008 7:55 am

(originally posted by virgo)

The helpline can also provide free financial and legal services depending upon your and your husband's needs. They also have great workbooks that can guide you through the recovery process. Everything the helpline offers is free. It will even pay for a visit with a treatment professional for you, your husband or both.

I agree that the helpline is definitely worth calling. The number is 1-888-236-4848 and they answer the phone all the time.

mramos
Posts: 22
Joined: Fri Aug 15, 2008 3:26 pm
Location: Orlando, Florida

Choose to make your life better...

Post by mramos » Fri Sep 18, 2009 10:31 am

Alot of times spouses are severely affected by situations that problem gambling has caused. Depression, despair and even suicide in some cases. Admiting that a loved one has a problem is just the first step, taking steps towards making your life better should follow. Educate yourself on the addiciton, talk about it. You can contact the Council nearest you by calling 1-800-522-4700. Trained professionals are available to provide you with options and info on free help in your area. Grab a pen/pencil and paper and call!
Your beliefs become your thoughts.
Your thoughts become your words.
Your words become your actions.
Your actions become your habits.
Your habits become your values.
Your values become your destiny.
Mahatma Gandhi (1869 - 1948)

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